iamthedukeofurl:

wholockian-at-hogwarts:

WHAT DO YOU AMERICANS MEAN WHEN A SHOW IS ON AT LIKE FUCKIN “8/7c” WHAT IS THAT????

We never switched over to metric timekeeping. The c stands for “Caw”, referring to how many times a majestic eagle has flown overhead and cawed that day. Sometimes the eagles are feeling sluggish, so the show could be on after either the 7th or 8th caw. 

unfollowfriday:

when a straight guy wants to show you something on youtube

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luckydreaming:

my anaconda don’t…

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my anaconda don’t…

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My anaconda dont’ want none unless you got buns hun

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dadsworstnightmare:

if you feel personally attacked by nicki minaj’s comments on yr skinniness please go turn on the tv and see all the girls with yr body type modelling clothing & hosting tv shows & acting in major films to make yourself feel better……..

codeinewarrior:

*walks into starbucks* lemme get uh spaghetti bolognese macchiato

"sir we don’t serve that"

don’t bullshit me i saw the secret menu on instagram

I’ve been looking out the window for eighteen years, dreaming about what it would feel like when those lights rise in the sky.